24 December 2009

Merry Christmas in the Spirit of DV!

The weather outside may be frightful, but one of my dearest friends has some oh-so delightful tips for ringing in the holidays...in the spirit of Diana Vreeland, of course. Whether you are throwing a holiday party, preparing for New Year's Eve, or just having a quiet evening celebrating with friends and family, her over-the-top, glamorous tips are sure to get your holiday season off to a smashing start! Diana Vreeland would be proud.


Why don’t you ...rent the International Space Station for your New Year’s Eve bash this year?


Why don’t you... cover your entire bathroom in mirrored panels, to ensure that you’ve seen every angle before you walk into the parlor?


Why don’t you... perfect your ability to say “Happy Holidays” in every language imaginable so that you can send seasonal greetings to every head of state in the world?


Why don’t you... use the leftover Prosecco to wash your delicates? Flat is best.


Why don’t you... commission a broom made of horsehair from Derby winners? Cleaning up can be glamorous, too.


Why don’t you... crochet a fabulous new hair accessory for each of your holiday guests? They should be useful as napkin rings as well as lovely parting gifts.


Why don’t you... build a guest dormitory on the back of your house, so that there will be room for all of your guests after a night of too many G&Ts?


Why don’t you... hand dip currants halfway in white chocolate, and then dip the other half in dark chocolate? Leaving a beautiful ruby strip in between would tasteful as well.


Why don’t you... decorate your roofline with Gothic creature waterspouts instead of downspouts? A few flying buttressed wouldn’t hurt, either.


Why don’t you... hire a string quartet to play on your front lawn in time with your Christmas light show?


Why don’t you... carve utensils out of your turkey carcass to use for brunch the next day?


Why don’t you... install TV monitors into the children’s table, playing nothing but Reading Rainbow and Wishbone?


Why don’t you... garnish every dish with gold dusted parsley? Curly if you are serving ham - flat with turkey or beef.Why don’t you cut your rolls of wrapping paper into 2” squares, creating patchwork paper quilts around all of your presents?


Why don’t you... insist on a royal purple silk carpet leading up to your home when your guests arrive?


Why don’t you... switch the hymnals for Where’s Waldo books during an Advent service?


Why don’t you... place original Louise Nevelson collage pieces at every Salvation Army red bucket that you see?


Why don’t you... juxtapose lush organza and brushed flannel linens with miniature Christmas trees and yellow lilies for your tablescape? A few rocks, polished with sea water, can provide a geological edge.


Why don’t you... turn last year’s holiday cards into bows to place atop the original senders’ gifts?


Why don’t you... weave a new area rug out of holly & poinsettia leaves?


Why don’t you... hire a hot air balloon to throw candy and H1N1 vaccines down to the neighborhood children?

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